My StoryJust in case you wanted to know a little bit more about me
Okay, so I am super nervous about sharing this BUT I know that if one person is inspired, if one woman realizes her worth, if one person makes one small change because of my story, then sharing this with you WAS worth it.
So let’s step back to 2009 when I took back control of my life…
What my life looked like in 2009:
I was married to an abusive and controlling husband
In 2005 we had a son together and I had to make the hard decision to remove him from life support
In 2006 I had a miscarriage
I was on LOTS of antidepressants and saw no point in my life, I regularly had suicidal thoughts and was a cutter
I was on a daily migraine medication and frequently missed work because of them
I was 193 pounds, I had issues with binge eating, secret eating and tried and failed at going to overeaters anonymous meetings
I had a very small circle of friends and had distanced myself from my family
In the Spring of 2009 I left my ex-husband, moved into a Motel 8 with my Great Dane Lilee <3 and figured out how to live on my own for the first time in my life. (This is why Lilee meant the world to me and I still grieve her, she was my ONE TRUE constant during this time in my life.) Thank god my family welcomed me back and I had a dear friend who helped me at every step; she knows who she is.
Fast forward to the end of that summer and I was living in my own apartment, driving a car held together by packaging tape and bungee cords (seriously) and I was enrolled fulltime at school. I was finally dropping weight and I no longer took ANY antidepressants or migraine medications. I was however still fighting to get my divorce finalized and considering a restraining order.
I slowly started making positive changes and overtime I started to realize how serious of a situation I had been in, how toxic that relationship was- I had a lot of healing to do.
Over the next 3 years I worked my ass off in school, work, and volunteer work and suppressed my own personal issues and healing with a really busy schedule. I did slowly start to come out of my shell and realize my worth. But, I still wasn’t done healing both mentally and physically.
In 2012 I graduated with my Bachelor of Science degree and I had a healthy, positive and strong relationship for the first time in my life. Unfortunately it still took me 3 more years to realize it – thank god Jeremy is a patient man and married me anyway in 2013.
Over the next few years after college, I grew my business, later it became our business and we moved to Puerto Rico in 2014. While the decision to move here was fast, we put a lot of discussion into it. We made the decision together that we did not want children; we were more than happy to be dog parents and remain childfree. We wanted to travel and experience as much as we could. We are very blessed in being able to work anywhere with internet and Puerto Rico is MUCH more affordable for us as compared to Colorado so we made the decision to live for us and we moved to start our adventure.
I still had some healing to do – I can be very stubborn. 😉 Thank you Jeremy for being so patient.
So now it’s 2015 and I still suffered from trust issues, low self-esteem, and was still yo-yoing with my weight. I still hadn’t quite figured out my binge eating and secret eating issues and I could never find consistency with a workout routine and nutrition. One step and one issue at a time right?
Then I discovered the power of positive thoughts and realized I still didn’t trust Jeremy, even after all this time and even though he had NEVER done anything wrong. I was still letting my past dictate my future. So with lots of work redirecting my negative thoughts into positive energy and lots of patience from Jeremy, I changed my mindset and I became a happier and trusting person. I swear that I heard the birds singing and the bells ringing; this was an extremely freeing moment for me. It’s amazing how much mind space negative thoughts can take up!
Now down to the final thing I needed to figure out – my food addiction issues and how to finally make a permanent lifestyle change. This is when I found Beachbody. I initially signed up as a coach very selfishly to hold myself more accountable. I figured I had to stick with this nutrition and fitness program if I expected others to do it with me, right?!
Well very quickly I discovered a passion I didn’t know existed within me and that passion is helping other women realize their worth, their full potential and to help them take ownership of their health and fitness.
When we are healthy, happy women we are better wives, mothers, friends, sisters, daughters, the list goes on. Life is just better! Those around us are happier; things just start to fall into place when you have a healthy body and mind. Granted I am still in progress with my health and fitness journey but I think that will always remain true. We are a constant work in progress and I think that it’s so beautiful what we can grow into and become as women.
I share all this not to get a pat on the back for coming out of my struggles but to show you change is a process, it’s a bunch of continuous small steps and actions done over and over and over. Even when you don’t see or feel change? You keep on doing them because at some point a shift will happen and you become what you’ve always desired, what you always knew was at your core.
I hope that by sharing this, one person can relate to my story, one person can relate to my struggles and find the strength to take that first small step forward, and another and another…
Thank you for taking the time to read this 🙂